Releasing unwanted thoughts and feelings
A simple, practical tool for releasing unwanted thoughts and feelings.
Today I want to share a practical tool that I have found extremely useful in releasing old, unwanted habits of thought and negative emotion. The tool can be thought of as a practical means of surrender, and is called going limp.
I was taught going limp at drama school, where we used it both personally and in our work, and honestly, it has changed my life.
Going Limp
What is it?
I guess you could call it a mental action. It’s a conscious request you make to yourself to surrender. Whilst the decision to go limp is a cognitive decision, the going limp itself is a feeling process.
Literally, to go limp is to relax. If your body is in a state of tension, being limp is the opposite: Complete physical relaxation. As this is a mental action, to go limp is to relax mental tension (resistance in the way of thoughts and negative emotion.)
How do you go limp?
You need to train your mind to go limp, so at first, practice it like you would an affirmation. Say to yourself: I go limp. Then, feel into a place of mental relaxation. Whilst practicing, hold onto the impression of being limp for 10 seconds or so, then just let it go. Keep coming back to it, and over time, you will automatically recall the sensation of being limp as it becomes muscle-memory.
A metaphor for going limp is to imagine you are holding a bunch of balloons, and then you just let them go, allowing them to float away.
Going limp is to surrender control, and to simply allow what is. It is acceptance, like shrugging and saying to yourself: ‘okay’.
Going limp is not repression. It shouldn’t feel like you’re holding a cork under water, but quite the opposite; like letting go of a cork you’ve been trying to suppress, letting it bounce back to the surface where it wants to go.
It should feel easy.
Another metaphor for going limp is the way Hermione Granger deals with Devil’s Snare in the film version of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone. Upon contact, Devil’s Snare (a plant) wraps itself around it’s victim, threatening to suffocate it. The way to free yourself of Devil’s Snare is not to fight it, but to surrender to it. By releasing the struggle, Hermione becomes encompassed by the plant at first, but is then released by it and set free.
When to go limp
Whenever you feel negative emotion or the presence of unwanted thoughts, you can go limp. When we experience negative thoughts and emotions, our usual response is to either engage with them, or to try and fight them. Both only give the thought or emotion more power. Like with Devil’s Snare, the more you struggle the stronger it becomes.
When you allow a thought or emotion to exist without trying to control it, you are actually saying ‘I see you, and I accept you for what you are, but I will not try to control you because I know you are just a thought/ emotion and you do not define me.’ Through acceptance comes surrender, and the thought/ emotion is weakened, eventually setting you free.
I hope that you find this tool helpful. I welcome any questions if you’re wanting to find out more or are struggling to apply it. It’s a simple tool, but can sometimes take time to feel into. Nonetheless, it’s a game changer once you get the hang of it!