What to do when you feel restricted by the pressure of time

The idea that we are restricted by time is an illusion. Here’s why I’ve decided to give up the hustle.

I am so glad to have come to a place recently where I very much feel that time does not restrict me.

Not so long ago, I was always hustling – just as a lot of people are always hustling. We hustle because of our perception of time, because we fear that there isn’t enough of it. Now that I’ve come to shift my perspective of time, I kinda struggle to justify what the rush was all about in the first instance?

I had a tendency to set myself a lot of deadlines, and many of them were unrealistic:

A couple of years ago, I wanted to tone up and lose a little bit of weight. Six weeks was the deadline I set myself, with a target of 1 kg per week. Realistic? Yes … but only by seriously decreasing my daily calorie intake whilst smashing out intense workouts 5 days a week. Who needs that kind of pressure?

I had an idea for a short film. I set myself the goal of writing and producing it within 6 months. Do-able? Yes, technically. But again, who needs that kind of pressure?!

I decided (pre-Covid, might I add) that I wanted to travel internationally, which was to include a road trip through North America, as well as a detour via Europe to catch up with old friends. This is totally possible – but extremely stressful with the timeline of 8 months that I was giving myself to save funds!

I’ve always been a high achiever, but why my ambition was served to me with a side dish of ‘hurry up’, I have no idea.

Well … I do have an idea. Based on my experience, here’s what I think the race against time is all about:

1. A fear of dying before we get it all done

I don’t want to die having never achieved everything that I wanted to achieve.

I don’t want to die, despairing that I never became the version of myself that I wanted to become.

I don’t want to die with regret.

I think that it is totally natural and common for people to have this fear. Death is a concept that we tend to want to avoid as a society, as we can never be certain as to what death actually means. Does death really mean that we are no more? Is it permanent? Can we guarantee that there is an afterlife of some kind?

As per the examples from my past that I provided above:

I didn’t want to die before getting the chance to travel.

I didn’t want to die not being the ‘best’ version of myself, physically.

I was afraid of what it would mean if I didn’t produce that project before I would potentially never again have the chance.

The important thing here is this: It isn’t really about the things themselves (the travelling and the short film). It’s about what those things represent.

2. A fear of what it will mean if we don’t get it all done

In other words: A fear that we will be unable to prove ourselves.

This refers specifically to the underlying beliefs and shameful thoughts that we have about ourselves. It is these negative beliefs and shameful thoughts that drive us as we strive to overcome them. It is the thought or belief, therefore, that scares us. What if the thought/ belief is true? We think that if we are unable to prove it wrong or override it in some way, it’ll define us and become the truth of our existence.

An old belief of mine (that I still like to entertain from time to time) is that I don’t matter. I push to get things done, such as a creative project, for the purpose of running from this thought. I hope that the final product (the completed short film, in this case) will render me important and worthy.

A fearful thought, to our minds, is like running from a predator. Time is of the essence, as we want to outrun the lion before it catches us first.

3. We fear it because the others’ fear it

Here, I believe that we simply work off of others. We see that everyone else is hustling and rushing, and we think: Maybe there is something that I’m missing? Nobody wants to get left behind.

The Tony Robbins’* of the world tell us that we have to do it, and we have to do it NOW. My heart starts beating harder just hearing that concept. It’s stressful!

People that hustle and rush are just as vulnerable to negative self beliefs as the rest of us. Consider, therefore, that just because they encourage fast action, doesn’t mean that they are correct. Perhaps they are also afraid?

*I’m not dissing Tony Robbins specifically. I am referring to the vast pool of doers out there who emphasise action and encourage hustle. For me, (and for many others I know) this sort of attitude can cause a lot of unnecessary anxiety. Hustling isn’t the only way to get things done.

Now that I’ve nutted out the problem, here’s what I think the solution is:

1. Put your blinders on

I first heard this phrase via life coach Connie Chapman in her podcast ‘Awaken Radio’ and I think it’s a brilliant metaphor for sticking to your own path. Horse blinders are firm leather squares that attach to a horse’s bridle and prevent the horse from seeing behind and beside him. The idea is to block out the others and focus on your own journey, free of comparison.

Everybody has their own, unique journey. End of story. Do yourself the favour of resisting the urge to compare, as well as resisting the urge to compete. There is no competition (unless you are in the Olympics), therefore there is no need to race.

Nobody knows your unique needs and desires more than you. Follow your instincts and do things in your own time.

2. Develop faith in your eternity

I could be stepping on a few toes depending on what you believe, but I believe that we are all eternal beings.

Eternity is timeless, meaning there is plenty of ‘time’ to get it all done. Life, from this perspective, is an endless and steady stream of continually coming into alignment with a new and expanded version of yourself.

‘If I’m standing in my physical body and am consciously connected to that eternal spirit, then I’m eternal in nature and I need not ever again fear any endedness, because, from that perspective I understand that there is not any of that.’
– Abraham Hicks

3. Figure out why you’re doing what you’re doing

If you feel pressured by time when it comes to your goals and desires, I’d be confident in saying for certain that it is because some sort of negative belief is plaguing you.

One of the best things that you can do for yourself is release erroneous and restricting beliefs. Life flows a whole lot better when you do, because you aren’t running! You are content with who you and where you are at right NOW. You know that you do not need the weight loss, new job, perfect partner, etc. to complete you. Therefore, there is no rush.

It is predominantly this last point that has allowed me to shift my relationship with time. The less I fall for the thought that I am not enough, the more relaxed I feel in relation to my desires.

Be in it for the long haul, and prioritise joy and fulfilment by engaging fully with the present moment.